


Isn't It Strange

by murdocks_matthew



Series: Thiam Week 2017 [1]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Friends to Lovers, Future Fic, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, only a few years tho, thiamweek2017, thiamweek2k17
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-02
Updated: 2017-10-02
Packaged: 2019-01-08 09:51:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12251955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/murdocks_matthew/pseuds/murdocks_matthew
Summary: Theo wants Liam and he knows Liam wants him but he's afraid of losing everything for him."Please don't say you love me.""I'm sorry but I think I have to."Day one of thiam week: Hurt/Comfort





	Isn't It Strange

**Author's Note:**

> Originally I wrote this for friends to lovers but after it was done I believe it suits hurt/comfort more than my other one did. Let me know what you think!

Theo once thought all he wanted was power and a pack to control. He thought that was what would make him happy; he thought it would make his life feel whole. It took a while for him to see what he really wanted was to feel loved and and accepted. He didn’t want to be the leader of a pack instead he wanted to be part of one. Somehow he has that now with Scott’s pack. Somehow they managed to forgive him, or well most of them anyway, and accept him into the pack. There is no way Theo would do anything now to ruin that even if it means never going after Liam like he wants to.

 

He’s actually friends with Liam now and he loves that. Theo is honestly okay if they never become anything more than that as long as nothing chances. He’s never had to experience Liam dating anyone except for Hayden and he knows if Liam ever does get with someone it would kill him. Theo would suck it up though and pretend like everything is okay because he never wants to lose what he has with the pack, not even for Liam. Theo knows that Liam loves him, he’d be blind if he didn’t, but he can’t take the chance it wouldn’t work out. He’s afraid of if they end and it’s messy that he would be pushed out of the pack he worked so hard to join. Even if Theo refuses to admit it he’s more afraid of getting with Liam and having him realize he doesn’t actually want Theo. Liam has the power to  _ ruin _ him and that terrifies Theo.

 

“Hey Theo I need your help.” Liam walking into Theo’s apartment without even knocking. Theo smiles slightly amused by the way Liam acts as if he owns the place.

 

“With what?” Theo asks motioning Liam to sit down next to him.

 

“I’m trying to decide if I should do something that’s possibly incredibly stupid. Actually well I already did the stupid thing but I’m trying to decide if I should tell you about the stupid thing, which could possibly be even more stupid than doing the thing. You know what maybe I should just leave.” Liam rambles and then stands up like he’s going to leave. Theo pulls him back down before he actually starts to leave.

 

 “Just tell me Liam you know you can tell me anything and I won’t judge. We’re friends aren’t we?” 

 

“That’s the thing we are friends,” Liam begins and then pauses for what feels like an eternity. Theo is starting to gather where this conversation is going and feels his heart start to race. “If I tell you you this I won’t be able to take it back and everything will change whether we want it to or not. I don’t know if I’m ready for the consequences of that but I also don’t think I can pretend any longer.”

 

“Please don’t say you love me,” Theo begs cutting Liam off. “We can pretend that you never came over here and everything can stay the same if you don’t say it.” He’s looking into Liam’s eyes hoping he can see how much he is begging him not to say it. 

 

“I’m sorry Theo I think I have to. I’m in love with you and I have been for a while.” Liam smiles sadly with the smallest trace of tears in his eyes. It’s a heartbreaking sight and Theo makes himself turn away. He gets up off the couch and moves away from Liam.

 

“We’re friends Liam we’re just friends and we can’t be anything more. I don’t want to be anything more.” The words feel like fire in his mouth but Theo makes himself say them. He can’t do this he can’t risk losing everyone, he just can’t. 

 

“You’re lying we’re not just friends and you fucking know it. I see the way you look at me and it’s not the way someone looks at a friend. You look at me like I’m everything you ever wanted but everything you can’t have. You can have me though if you would let yourself. I know you’re in love with me and I think you do too. If you say that you’re not you’re lying either to me or to yourself and I don’t know which is worse.” Liam says while getting up and walking over to Theo without breaking eye contact. Theo feels naked he feels like Liam is looking into his soul and everything is on display. It makes him want to run and hide but he can’t do that no matter how much his instincts are telling him to.

 

“I’m not in love,” Theo starts but finds himself unable to lie while looking Liam in the eye. “I can’t do this Liam.”

 

“You can if you want to.” Liam responds taking another step closer and putting his hand on Theo’s face. Theo pulls away and takes a step back.

 

“No I can’t Liam. I’m sorry but I just can’t. I wish I could but I can’t” Theo says looking at the ground so Liam can’t see the tears in his eyes.

 

“Why not Theo? If you tell me why not I’ll leave it alone.”

 

“I’m sorry Liam I can’t do this. You have no idea how much I want to, how much I’ve thought about it but I just can’t risk it. I can’t risk us getting together and breaking up and the pack kicking me out. I can’t risk that you might change your mind and leave me. I wouldn’t be able to handle that. Why did you have to say you love me and change everything was perfectly fine before. I was perfectly fine pretending.” Theo says looking up at Liam. He feels a few tears fall but doesn’t bother wiping them away, the damage has already been done.

 

“I wasn’t okay pretending Theo. It was fucking killing me every time I looked at you and wanted to kiss you. It was killing me that I was so afraid to tell you how I feel. I couldn’t do it any longer when I knew you feel the same way about me that I do about you. You have to know that I wouldn’t be doing this if I thought there was any chance I’d change my mind. You also have to know that the pack loves you and wouldn’t just kick you out after everything you’ve done.”

 

“They love you more and that’s exactly why they’d kick me out because everything I’ve done. They still haven’t forgiven me for what I’ve done and I don’t want to give them a reason to kick me out. I can’t handle being on my own again I just can’t okay. I don’t care if I never have you I just don’t want to be alone again. I refuse to risk losing everything when you could change your mind.” Theo says finally giving up and letting the tears fall down his face.

 

“They have forgiven you Theo they may have not forgotten but they’ve forgiven you. You wouldn’t be in the pack if they hadn’t. You’ve proved time and time again that you’ve changed and everyone can see that. The only person who hasn’t forgiven you is yourself. If you honestly think Scott would kick you out for having a bad break up with me than you don’t know him at all. As long as you don’t cheat or purposefully hurt me everything would be fine after a little while. I can’t promise you that we won’t break up but I can promise you that I love you.” Liam tells him now also crying.

 

“How has Scott forgiven me for trying to kill me, actually no i believe he has since he’s Scott but how has Malia forgiven me. How has Stiles forgiven me for trying to kill his best friend. No wait I did kill his best friend how am I supposed to be forgiven for that? How have you forgiven me for using you to kill Scott? You know I planned to kill you next. I’m an awful person and you know this. I killed my own sister. I’m a monster Liam, how can you love a monster?” Theo yells a little. His face is red as are his eyes and his face is wet from the tears that as still falling. It’s a heartbreaking sight.

 

“You have been forgiven because you’re not that guy anymore. You had been living with the Dread Doctors for years. They made you kill your sister.”

 

Theo laughs bitterly cutting Liam off. “They didn’t make me do anything I didn’t want to. I killed Tara because I wanted to be powerful and killing her could give me it. I wanted you to kill Scott so I could kill you for the Alpha power. How do you know I’m still not looking for a way to get that power?”  

 

“Peter killed his niece, he killed Derek’s sister. He turned Scott and tried to turn Lydia. He killed over a dozen people and I’m sure he did several other horrible acts but he’s still pack. Derek somehow managed to forgive him for Laura or is at least able to accept that he still loves his uncle no matter what he did. You know how Derek can do that? Peter wasn’t in the right state of mind when he committed those crimes and even though he doesn’t act like it Peter regrets them all. You were young when you killed your sister and were influenced by the Dread Doctors. Now while I wish I could blame every horrible act you did on them I know I can’t but they were a large part of the reason you did those awful things. I still love you though. I am able to love you despite what you have done because I know you regret doing those things. I know you aren’t just in the pack for power because how afraid you are of losing us. You’ve put your life on the line for us several times over the years and someone who just wanted power wouldn’t do that. I’m in love with you Theo Raeken. I’m in love with every part of you, even the parts that scare me.”

 

“I was going to kill you Liam; I was going to kill you without ever knowing you. I was going to kill you without knowing how much you could mean to me. You mean everything to me Liam. I might not be willing to give up the pack for you but I’d be willing to die for you. I was ready to die for you during the Wild Hunt and during the Anuk-Ite. That was before I realized what you meant to me. You were my anchor even back then. It terrifies me how much you mean to me.” Theo says finally starting to give in and admit that he wants Liam. 

 

“What do I mean to you Theo? Please say it. Please give us a chance.” Liam begs hopeful.

 

“I’m in love with you Liam. I don’t know for how long, maybe always, I just realized one day that you meant everything to me. I mean not so long ago we were fighting over everything and now we’re in love with each other. Isn’t it funny how that happens? How day by day it seems as if nothing has changed and then one day everything is different and you don’t know how that happened.” Theo says smiling slightly with tears still in his eyes but these are completely different from the ones that were there a moment ago. He feels free after finally admitting his feelings.

 

“I don’t think we will ever end our constant arguing even if we’re in a relationship but I think that’s okay with me.” Liam smiles stepping closer to Theo and putting his hand on Theo’s face again and this time Theo lets him. Theo’s cheeks are wet from the tears and Liam gently wipes them away.    

 

“I think it would be okay with me too. I’m still scared you know that this will end in ruins and heartbreak.” Theo admits putting his hand on top on Liam’s.

 

“Maybe it will but you’ll never know unless you try and if you try I’ll be with you every step of the way.” 

 

“You know that doesn’t sound half bad.” Theo says before kissing Liam. It’s everything he ever thought it would be times ten. He doesn’t know how he was so scared of someone who feels like home. He wishes he had done this sooner but maybe it’s best that they waited. It gave them time to grow up and know for sure this is what they want. “I love you.” He whispers when they pull apart.  

 

“I know you do and I love you too.” Liam replies and Theo smiles before Liam kisses him again. Liam’s right they don’t know how this is going to end, maybe it will end exactly like how Theo always thought it would but he’s going to enjoy figuring that out with Liam. 

 


End file.
